12/14/2007: "Bikini"

Looking at the county budget is like staring at a really fat girl in a bikini, you can’t help but look and then you wish you hadn’t. I’m glad the looking is over. The big fat flabby budget is passed.

This whopping 53 million-dollar budget really packs a lot into such a petite sized county. We ended up with 10 new full-time employees bringing our total to 250 (The largest employer in the county is now the County). We gained a housing coordinator and several paid facilitators for committees whose recommendations are generally ignored. They gave a generous subsidy to the Orcas farmers market, and everybody got lots of brand new equipment. Like Santa Claus the Council opened up the big bag and gave gifts to just about everyone.

They did not budget any money to fix the “weeping wall” inside the Courthouse. That’s right. The existing courthouse leaks like the Titanic and they keep saying that they don’t have enough money to fix it. The procrastination has become legendary.

If we keep growing the government at this pace we will need a new wing on the courthouse. Next we will be told that a desperately needed addition will solve the leak problem. For just a few million we can tear down the “weeping wall” and build a new Courthouse wing! The leak will be fixed and there will be room for all the new hires. But first we need to do an expensive study. How’s that for efficiency.

We were told that we need all of this additional spending because San Juan County is the fastest growing county in the state. This is bunk! * We actually have the fastest growing government per capita but we are not growing fast at all compared to other counties (Unless you call adding 200 retirees a year fast).

Some councilmen spoke out with concern about the shocking increase in spending for 2008 but that did not stop them from voting to approve it. What they say and what they do are altogether different. It’s like they say they are on a diet but refuse to lose weight. Does my budget look too fat in this skimpy outfit? Damn right it does!

I will make a bold prediction and a couple of promises for 2008. Our County will spend all of this budget and more. I promise not to write any more columns about the budget this year. I promise not to poke fun at plump girls in bikinis ever again. It doesn’t make your butt look big, honest!

* http://www.ofm.wa.gov/pop/april1/cocmpch2007.pdf